The Birth of this Blog

10 Sep

I remember it clearly – my husband was asleep, so were my kids, well at least for the next half-an-hour before one or both would wake up and need attention. It was my chance to read for a few minutes before bed.

I was on a wave, jumping from blog to blog – devouring the stories. When I hit Literary Mama, I stayed. Before I knew it, it was 5am. The swollen eyes the next morning had nothing to do with my usually non-sleeping twin toddlers. Instead of catching up on much-needed sleep, I was reading and forwarding links to my friends. Honest Voices: A Review of Call Me Okaasan: Adventures in Multicultural Mothering a book review by Literary Mama columnist, Avery Fischer Udagawa caught my attention. It was the first time I’d read anything about multicultural parenting.

Call Me Okaasan: Adventures in Multicultural Mothering, is a collection of stories by mothers in Japan, Israel, South Africa, the US and so on, raising bi / multi – cultural families. Avery herself is American married to a Japanese man. They live in Thailand with their two children.  Like Avery’s children, mine were starting to say words in different languages, speaking to me in English, to my husband in French and to their ayi (nanny) in Mandarin.

I particularly appreciated Avery’s reflection on the patterns in her writing about parenting, which she described as a “nagging tendency to dwell on the positive and project certainty. The reality, as my family has learned, is often more complicated.”

I forwarded her piece to a group of my own mum friends, all of whom could relate in one way or another, and suggested we write our own simple stories of Multicultural Mothering. The positive response drove us to create this blog. Most of us are neither writers nor bloggers, and yet we enjoy reading about each other’s experiences, discussing them, celebrating our friend’s successes, and above all finding support in each other.

Here’s an excerpt of Avery’s review of Call Me Okaasan: Adventures in Multicultural Mothering.

“Life among four worlds — America, Japan, Thailand, and the expat world — brings many benefits. Our three-and-a-half-year-old daughter enjoys a Wee Sing song with greetings in several languages not because the words are foreign, but because she actually uses them: hello with Mommy, konnichiwa with Daddy, ciao with our Ecuadorian neighbor, shalom with a teen at the international school. We slip in sawat dii kha, which she uses all day every day with Thais. I love to think that these words are all hers, and that I grew up in Kansas but can hear a child speak Japanese in a mall in Bangkok and realize that it’s my own offspring. My husband and I were thrilled recently to welcome a second child to our mélange of worlds.

But life abroad is not simple. Our preschooler sometimes has to be prompted by my husband to use his native Japanese here, while she readily uses my American English, except when it’s Thai-accented English, which she believes she should use with Thais. Like us, she is least fluent in the language of our host country, though she was born here. I wonder sometimes about her future: Where will she call home? Will she feel chronically displaced? Despite all of the people, places, and words she knows, will she feel cast adrift?

These are questions specific to people raising children among cultures, and ones I seldom see addressed in parenting books. I am happy to report that Call Me Okaasan: Adventures in Multicultural Mothering is an exception to this rule. This collection of 21 essays by mother-writers in expatriate, international, adopting, and/or diversity-seeking families offers the kinds of stories I hear and tell daily, about parenting in multiple languages, juggling identities, and rearing children in terra incognita. It also addresses challenges of parenting among different worlds, including some much more daunting than my family and I have faced.”

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I am yet to get my hands on a copy of the book. It will be soon I hope. Read Avery’s full review here.

The Call Me Okaasan: Adventures in Multicultural Mothering Facebook page

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I live in Chengdu with my husband Maher and our two-year-old twins Leila and Rahul.  I was an Ashtanga Yoga teacher until Our Little Yogis became the teachers.

3 Responses to “The Birth of this Blog”

  1. RENUKA September 10, 2012 at 7:21 pm #

    And you did good girl! Being a parent is challenging enough and doing it in a foreign country……..
    But this gives us a sense of community and belonging as Mums from everywhere, we are bonded by that. I don’t feel alone anymore.Thanks to you for doing it and thanks to everyone else who shares their stories and lives here.

    • natasha devalia September 10, 2012 at 8:53 pm #

      Thanks Renu! It really does give a sense of community, even if we are all scattered across the globe. And I’ll add my own thanks to those who share their stories and comments over here.

  2. Lois April 20, 2013 at 10:59 am #

    I create a comment whenever I like a article on a site or I have something to contribute to the discussion.
    It is a result of the sincerness displayed in the article I read.
    And after this article The Birth of this Blog | Multicultural
    Mothering. I was actually excited enough to drop a thought 🙂 I do have 2 questions for you if it’s okay. Is it just me or do a few of these responses come across like they are written by brain dead visitors? 😛 And, if you are posting at other online social sites, I would like to keep up with anything fresh you have to post. Could you make a list every one of all your public sites like your twitter feed, Facebook page or linkedin profile?

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